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为什么有些人找对象时感觉男高女矮就正常,女高男矮就会有心理压力?

我国婚配历来有"男高女低"的传统

即男方在经济、社会、文化等各个方面都要高于女性。

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《白虎通·嫁娶》提到,“男三十而娶,女二十而嫁”,男女婚龄差古即有之。择偶的年龄匹配倾向于“男大女小。

造成"男高女低"的原因有:"男主外、女主内"的传统观念、女性资源短缺。

我们把这种“男高女低”的现象称为“婚姻梯度效应”。

现阶段的婚姻梯度主要表现在几个方面:

  • 男性的年龄比女性大
  • 男性的工作比女性好
  • 男性的受教育程度比女性髙

择偶的年龄匹配

城市和农村的差异在择偶过程中,男性要求女性年龄小,女性要求男性学历高。男性要求女性在年龄、教育背景、职业收入、社会地位等方面低于自己,女性要求男性在年龄、身高、学历、收入、家庭条件等方面优于自己。

进入21世纪,男女年龄上的“男大女小”规则被打破,夫妻婚龄差有这样的特点:"男大女小"明显多于"女大男小"、男性比女性大1-4岁和夫妻同岁的情况最为普遍、女性比男性大1-2岁的情况也不少。

基于国家统计局1%人口变动抽样调查样本,20世纪90年代北京市夫妇年龄差比例由高到低依次是:男大女小、男女同岁和女大男小。婚龄差随着夫妻受教育程度的提高呈U型曲线,教育程度为小学以下和大学以上夫妇婚龄差较大,教育程度为初高中的夫妇婚龄差较小。

择偶的教育水平匹配

择偶的教育匹配主要有同类婚和向上婚两种,依旧呈现出男高女低的特点。本科及以上的夫妇中同类婚的比例最高,向上婚的比例明显高于向下婚。一项基于北京市2006-2009年婚姻登记数据的研究表明,夫妻学历相同的同类婚占比超过50%,其次是男高女低的向上婚和女高男低的向下婚。随着义务教育和高等教育的普及和扩张,教育梯度的边界不断增强,同类婚的趋势增多。

择偶梯度带来了婚姻挤压,对男性和女性都有影响。条件差的男性在婚姻市场上毫无竞争力,条件好的女性也难觅佳偶,不仅增加了大龄未婚青年的婚配压力,也不利于社会的稳定。我国男女依照个人条件可分为:

甲乙丙丁四个等级

各方面条件都很优秀的甲女找不到配偶。男性和女性的社会差异不断缩小,“男高女低”的婚配模式导致甲女择偶困难,已经不适合社会发展的需要,应向“男女同等”的婚配模式过渡。

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参考文献:

李志宏.北京市夫妇年龄差分析田.人口与发展,2004, 10(5):41-48.

 

There has always been a tradition of “male and female low” in marriage in China

That is, the man in economic, social, cultural and other aspects are higher than women.
Photo by Pixabay on pexels.com “White Tiger Tong married” mentioned that “male 30 and married, female 20 and married”, the age of marriage between men and women is ancient.

The age matching of mate selection tends to be “male big female.”

The reasons for “low male and female” are: the traditional concept of “male and female”, the shortage of female resources.

We refer to this phenomenon of “low male height female” as “marriage gradient effect”.

At this stage, the marriage gradient is mainly manifested in several aspects:

  • Men are older than women.
  • Men work better than women.
  • Men are less educated than women too high

Age matching of mate selection Differences between urban and rural areas in the process of choosing a mate, men require women to be young and women to require a high level of male education.

Men require women to be inferior to themselves in terms of age, educational background, occupational income, social status, etc., and women require men to be superior to themselves in terms of age, height, education, income, family conditions, etc.

Entering the 21st century, the “male and female small” rules of the age of men and women were broken, and the difference in marriage between husband and wife was characterized by a marked “male and female”, which was significantly higher than “female male and Young”, men were 1-4 years older than women, and couples were the same age, and women were 1-2 years older than men. Based on the sample survey of 1% population changes in the National Bureau of Statistics, The age difference ratio of Beijing couples from high to low in the 1990s was as follows: male and female, male and female, male and young.

The difference in the age of marriage is U-shaped curve with the improvement of the educational level of husband and wife, the education level is lower than that of couples below primary school and above university, and the marriage level of couples with junior high school is less poor.
Matching the educational level of choosing a mate The educational matching of mate selection mainly has the same kind of marriage and upward marriage two kinds, still presents the characteristic of male high female low. The proportion of couples in the same category and above is the highest, and the rate of upward marriage is significantly higher than that of downward marriage. A study based on the registration data of marriages in Beijing in 2006-2009 showed that the proportion of couples with the same degree of marriage was more than 50%, followed by the low marriage of men and women and the lower marriage of female Takao.

With the popularization and expansion of compulsory education and higher education, the boundary of educational gradient is increasing, and the trend of similar marriage is increasing. The gradient of mate selection brings about marriage squeezing and has an impact on both men and women. Men in poor conditions are not competitive in the marriage market, and women in good condition are difficult to find a mate, which not only increases the marriage pressure of older unmarried young people, but also is not conducive to social stability.

Men and women in our country can be divided into:

Four grades of Ethyl a A daughter who is very good in all aspects of the condition can not find a spouse.

The social differences between men and women are shrinking, and the matchmaking model of “male high female and low” leads to the difficulty of choosing a mate for a woman, which is no longer suitable for the needs of social development, and should be transitioned to the “equal to men and women” matchmaking model.

References:

Li Zhihong. Analysis of the age difference of the Beijing couple. Population and Development, 2004, 10 (5): 41-48.

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